“When the earth and the people are ravaged and the animals and plants are dying, a new tribe of people shall come unto the earth from many colours, classes, faiths, creeds, knowledges and wisdom, and who by their actions and deeds shall make the earth green, full of love, compassion, kindness, forgiveness and spiritual again. They will be known as the Warriors of the Rainbow.”
My spiritualized life!
Been born in 1971.
I Had my first peek into the spirit world at 3 years of age, and an otherwise rough and magical childhood.
The peek into the spirit-world happened when my mum brought me to an obligatory eye doctors visit and, I had to look into an apparatus and identify what I see, but I am quite sure now that the apparatus was maladjusted, either intendedly or due to lack of attention because of the eye doctors age.
I saw the picture of a bigger star in the apparatus as opposed to the doctor insisting it had to be a bird and following, him prescribing me some 0,25 diopter glasses. And today I surmise that with such a low diopter you can’t confuse a bird with a bigger star.
In Kindergarten than the Kindergarten teacher asked me why I didn’t want to wear the eyeglasses, and in my desperation i peeked into the spirit world and saw the spirits of the other kids, from where I got the info that the other kids would bully me for being a “four-eyes”, because i “Knew” something was wrong, the teacher kind of wanting to punish or force me to wear the glasses again, and told her the other kids would bully me for being a “four-eyes”.
I also don’t see in retrospective me needing glasses then, because I had a very good vision then, showing itself when I shot with my bow and arrow directly into the third eye of a friend who tortured someone on the stake.
Later in life, I found out that my eyes would somehow get weaker because of the glasses, and I had to now and then get stronger glasses, but since I refuse to get new glasses nowadays, my eyesight stays the same.
Smoked my first splif in 1988, whence I had a fantastic laughing time and afterward I had some mystical and spiritual experiences, and an otherwise rough turmoiled and magical youth.
I once sat in winter on a snowy hill, when I left during a skiing trip the busy main skiing strips and went on a side strip, and when no one was showing up, I sat in total silence, because the snow absorbed all the environmental noises, and had an intense impression of some mystical kind of infinite spirit (world) surrounding me and penetrating the ambiance (difficult to explain with words).
I also had some energetical spiritual experiences on hash, when I and my hippy friends started to dance and freak out, out of nothing.
Once reading a passage out of the New Testament while high on hash, I somehow without a doubt “Knew” that the Bible is true, and later learned that is also should be interpreted.
Because I loved and still love music, though my angels advised me to acquire a stereo and music media first, to get inspired by this music, I started to learn the guitar first, with the desire to impress people.
A little later in life after some magical experiences, e.g. tripping on acid and giving up fear on the trip, traveling into another world, I looked for a creative expression of that all, myself, for my love of music, the arts, writing and the people and I tried to find a true expression of my experiences, and more experiences on a vision quest through the world.
While I traveled through Mexico, I went to Huautla de Jimenez, because I read about this magical mushroom village, from where the famous mushroom healer Maria Sabina stemmed, and after arriving there, I was led to a local known Mazatek Holy Mushroom curandera.
I had some problems with hair loss, and after she asked me a few times to join a holy mushroom Velada which I refused, because of me not feeling being ready fur such, I later asked the healer myself for a Velada, when I thought I felt ready.
During this holy ceremony, I saw a black devilish-like spirit.
The next day after the ceremony I asked her about this demon, when she answered, that she doesn’t know or don’t understand, because her Spanish and mine were not too good. She also told me, that I am a curandero too, because she saw three Angelitos, each sitting on top of my shoulders and on my head.
After years of pondering the devil mystery, I learned back in Germany where I saw a guy with a black but peaceful aura, that it was not THE devil which I saw in the Velada, but the spirit of a person that turned away from love-light-god and became darkened, because it cast the light-love out of his aura (soul) and body. I also found out that this darkness is a kind of spiritual and psychological disease.
So in Mexico, I got interested in the healing arts but still was drawn to music and fine arts, which made me been torn between these two professions.
Tripping further through central America, I landed in a rainbow gathering in Guatemala on Lake Atitlan.
During a weeklong stay on the Chinese full moon new years gathering in mid-February, on a warm evening at the central fire I took a toke from a pure splif and started trippin’. I went away from the fire towards a high peak over the lake to relax, whence I felt an urge to stop by a pile of stones that looked like a little pyramid from which a green San Pedro like cactus was growing of. Staring at the cactus, it started to transform into a green ghost-man, that wanted to draw me with his mighty power into a dark abyss. I had to fight really hard to draw myself away from this frightening power ghost. Hurrying to the community oven fire, where a talk-about was happening, I sat with the other guys and gals around the fire, still feeling the power ghost trying to draw me back to the little stone pyramid into the blackness. Sitting there at the oven fire, really afraid, I started since a long time a second first sincere prayer question and said: “Jesus, if you really exist, please help me!” Suddenly I felt calmer and more secure and felt a strange presence behind me. Curiously I turned around and realized that Jesus had materialized behind my back in a beige robe with long hair and a beard his arms stretched out, like a priest in the Catholic church during his lord’s prayer sermon, trying to protect me. I could feel and see his fleshly presence! I swallowed and turned back to the fire, immediately starting to feel bad again and quickly turned my head around again to look after Jesus and acknowledged disappointed that he had dematerialized and disappeared again.
After these experiences, I traveled further on, to the solstice festivities in Chiapas. During my stay in Chichen-Itza, I had my first healer experience, where I channeled energy into the root chakra of a Japanese woman on the pyramids.
I traveled further to Palenque, where I took some Holy Mushrooms. I hiked through the jungle up the mountain to the Pyramids. During this trip, I was led by a mysterious hidden guide to encounter the astral-light-love-god on a little peak over a stream.
It was an Omni-color light shining through a round gate that showed me that everyone has gods light and love in themselves, and I later also learned that everything is made from this light and love and therefore spirited. I wanted to stare into this light on and on, and after it rose up into the skies I wanted to see it again and again, and so I tried a black magic trick from Carlos Castaneda’s books, in order to summon god, which made me fall on my head. I didn’t know then that it was black magic, which I only learned later in life. Proceduring the move I fell back on my head, I injured it and probably lost my “little soul” (according to Peruvian shamans).
From there on I went on a wild “psychotic” freedom ride adventure through Mexico and the United States until Germany.
In this freedom ride, I experienced a way too far diving into a totally meaningful, but not scary, spiritual reality, where everything had a special meaning towards me, even such simple things as towns names, but I also saw, maybe guided by the spirit, unexplainable things which were not hallucinations but parts of a maybe scientifical part of reality, like in a homeless shelter I woke up one night, went into the lobby and saw in front of an open door a queue of people standing, entering a room one by one and then them disappearing through some kind of buzzing massive flash of energy.
Later back in Germany, while rearranging myself into everyday reality with the help of my then girlfriend, having long talks about my experiences and a lot of love-making, beer, and hash, and without the aid of neuroleptics, after one time trying out the neuroleptic Haldol which only had an adverse effect of making me time travel and a CAM practitioner who wanted to push me even further into another reality, I asked the Universe and God, after a long ride through heavens and hells, fantastic sights and unbelievable abysses for advice and got the name “slow temple” for a music project. Whilst listening to the song “Starlight” by Lou Reed and John Cale from the album “Songs For Drella”, I played with the words and put the first letters from the words of the chorus line,
(s)tar (l)ight (o)pen (w)ide,
together to the word slow, asked for an extension to that name and got the answer, temple.
So I found my project name “slow temple”.
Not knowing what to do with my life, I tried to re-enter the system starting a multimedia designer education.
Trying to find answers for my life and seeing god again, I took some more mushrooms at home. The next day in school, still a little high from the previous day, I leaned against an open window and looked outside into the sky and for the first time in my life I saw some silver flying energy disk spaceships. Shortly after this experience, I had a nervous breakdown due to overworking and went to the looney bin. After weeks of taking neuroleptics and sobering out, I sat on the balcony of the ward and had a ciggie smoke in the evening. Staring seeking and calm into the starry night sky, a golden flying light captured my attention, and I thought, “…oh what a nice airplane”. I looked at the light some more moments and realized that it was pretty tiny and flew a perfectly straight line across the night sky, without that moving and grooving I was used to airplanes. I reconsidered my first thought and pondered awe-fully that it could maybe be a spaceship, whence I started to wave friendly at the light. It immediately stopped in the night sky and floated on a spot in the sky, when I sensed that they were checking me out. Then suddenly there seemed to open up a gate from which a growing golden light shone a huge beam of golden light on me, surrounded me and began to lift me up in the night sky towards the spaceship. I became excited and during my flight towards the spaceship, the astral bodies of Castaneda black magic sorcerers suddenly appeared at my side and with forceful power turned my head away from the spaceship. The aliens aborted the up beaming because I knew they thought that I was afraid and because they don’t want to scare or hurt nobody.
Later on, I had many crazy magical and wild experiences and visions, like maybe flying energy people materializing before me, meeting Lucifer, hells being summoned upon me, experiencing pure divine love, everlasting cleansing sadness, and the highest joy/bliss, and a lot of other crazy stuff……
..In the closed ward of our psychiatry, for example, in the smoking room, one of the fellow patients sat beside me one night and showed me his empty palm. Then my fellow patient with this empty and open palm touched my arm and has materialized a cigarillo where previously was none and he has then smoked it.
Now I have somehow embraced both realities and am living quasi with one foot in everyday reality and with the other in spiritual reality.
Now, years passing, the time has come to publish my music and my gathered info and knowledge, and I hope you like it, because the music somehow express the feelings I have from and towards the world, and like the American indigenous say, it is time that an old warrior is telling his tribe his gathered heart songs and gathered information and knowledge.
Now I started this blog, to put my flowing ideas, philosophies, thoughts, mediations, and visions into words, arts, and music, in order to not go crazier, maybe somehow inspire and give ideas to others, discuss said ideas and publish my and others spiritualized music, info, and knowledge!
The music was solely fantasized, in order to elevate the listener!
Greetings in the name of Jah Rastafari (or whatever you like to call her/him/it), everliving, ever clear, ever sure, ever peaceful, all loving, all merciful!
Everybody (!) is special and possesses their own medicine/talent/mission/uniqueness they can act out given by the almighty! Supported by NDE’ers, by my experiences in life and, my angels and my medicine wo/men I met in the Americas!
Robi “Mad Professor” Smrdelj